Today’s winning Irish joke!
Malcolm O’Reilly hoisted his beer and said, ‘Here’s to spendin’ the rest of me life between the legs of me wife!’
That won him the top prize at the local pub for the best toast of the night!
He went home and told his wife, Mary, ‘I won the prize for the best toast of the night!’
She said, ‘Aye, did ye now. And what was your toast?’
Malcolm said, ‘Here’s to spending the rest of me life, sitting in church beside me wife.’
‘Oh, that is very nice indeed, Malcolm!’ Mary said.
The next day, Mary ran into one of Malcolm’s drinking buddies on the street corner. The man chuckled leeringly and said, ‘Mal won the prize last night at the pub with a toast about you, Mary!’
She said, ‘Aye, he told me, and I was a bit surprised myself. You know, he’s only been there twice in the last four years. Once he fell asleep, and the other time I had to pull him by the ears to make him come.’