SPRAGGETT ON CHESS
Chinese Wedding Night
A young Chinese couple gets married.
She’s a virgin. Truth be told, he is a virgin too, but she doesn’t know that. On their wedding night, she cowers naked under the sheets as her husband undresses in the darkness.
He climbs into bed next to her and tries to be reassuring.
‘My darring,’ he whispers, ‘I know dis you firss time and you berry flighten … I promise you, I give you anyting you want, I do anyting – juss anyting you want.
You juss ask. Whatchu want?’ he says, trying to sound experienced and worldly, which he hopes will impress her.
A thoughtful silence follows and he waits patiently (and eagerly) for her request.
She eventually shyly whispers back, ‘I want to try someting I have hear about from odda girls… Numbaa 69.’
More thoughtful silence, this time from him. Eventually, in a puzzled tone he says to her….
‘You want Garlic Chicken wif Snow Peas?”
Oh! That is going too far!