SPRAGGETT ON CHESS
Victoria Chess Club
president and self-appointed guru Roger Patterson is famous for one thing and one
thing alone: the size of his penis! It is one of the world’s 8 wonders. At age 2 Roger had a Guiness World Record
for penis size: 1 metres and 18 cms long when fully erect.
Historic Photo of Scarborough Chess Club’s Bob Armstrong
along side a plastic mold of Roger Patterson’s flacid penis at age two years old. Icelandic Phallalgogical Museum
At his initiative. the CFC passed a motion in 2011 recognizing Roger as a child prodigy
Roger Patterson was destined for GREAT things. With a penis the size of an elephant by age 2 who could deny Roger his rightful destiny?
But destiny was not inclined to favour poor Roger. Pornography soon became illegal in Canada and anal sex tabu. There were no lucrative contracts for heavily endowed studs. By the time Roger was in high school he was already relegated to something of an after gym shower joke!
Roger became an outcast. A weirdo. A Joke But Roger soon found refuge at the school chess club. There Roger finally hoped to get his rightful recognition as the clubs’ biggest prick. But he was soon to be disappointed. Nerds attracted chicks for their intellectual awkwardness…NOT for the size of their reproductive organ.
Poor Roger (left) being ignored for his NATURAL gifts.
Thus began Roger’s long campaign to get his revenge on chess-playing NERDS. Roger soon villanized chess players with higher ratings than his own. To Roger it was all about penis size. He was the REAL champ and wanted the whole world to believe it….With a dick as big as his, why should he have to EARN his rightful place in the company of NERDS?
LATER TODAY, the whole story of Roger, his BIG dick and why he hates higher rated chess players…